Hope's Perspective

After reading Seth's most recent entry on the events of Emi's birth I have to say that my perspective is a little different from his. My thoughts:

My contractions, while definitely painful, were unlike any pain I've ever felt. My body was completely at their mercy... but it wasn't like I was being ripped apart or anything. I just moaned my way through them. (See, I don't know what Seth's talking about peeling me off the ceiling - I wasn't screaming or anything - I just said things like, "Oh my goodness" or "Oh my god, you guys, this hurts!" a lot). What was rough was that I didn't get a break. They started off at 9:15pm being about 8 minutes apart. Then 5, then 3 within an hour and a half. Interestingly, it never registered for me that I was in active labor. I just knew I was in pain. Hence the driving to get Seth, etc. By the time we were at the hospital they were literally one minute apart (even the nurse couldn't believe it). This just meant no break, no time to try different positions, just time to survive until the next one.

I finally got an epidural when I was 9 1/2 cm dilated. It took the doctor 3 contractions to get it in and set up - by the time he was done I had dilated to 10cm. Thanks to our doula and Seth's support I had made it all the way to push time without pain medication! Go team! We were proud. After the intense total-body itching sensation subsided (I mention this side effect of the epidural because nobody ever mentioned it to me and it took me by surprise) we did 45 minutes of "passive descent" - letting the baby come down into the birth canal on it's own since I was finally able to relax my body. It worked - and I pushed for only an hour in the quiet peace of the darkened room before Emi's time to come had arrived. The whole experience felt so fast for me - I could hardly believe it when I saw Emiko's head begin to make it's way into the world - 3 more pushes and she was in my arms. My world had changed forever in that moment - the emotions I felt are indescribable. Amazing.

So regardless of what our birth plan had laid out or what our expectations were, I feel that Emi's birth was just perfect. I was strong, Seth was strong and we supported each other tremendously. I wouldn't have changed a thing. Except maybe I would have asked Seth to stay home from hockey that night... but that wouldn't have made for such a good story.