I have been struggling to write this post and have finally decided to put it down in all its unkempt glory....
I am extremely ashamed that I have to admit that I really lost my temper on the ice several nights ago. There is some strange way that I and my friends can find a way to justify what happened but it doesn't make me feel any better that I lost control of my emotions. And I have been thinking about this post on and off for several weeks since I have not thought of a good way to put down in words exactly what happened.
Sunday night is drop in night. A good group of guys get together and play for over an hour at Apex...just a few minutes from my home. It is generally very laid back and tempers very rarely flair. But I'm afraid my temper reared its ugly little head that night.
Let me start off by outlining this situation.
Drop in hockey means that there are no officials on the ice. You change on the fly and the play does not stop unless you score, the goalie makes a save or someone gets hurt. You are on the honor code. If the play is offsides, you relinquish the puck.
There is also a certain etiquette you should follow during drop in hockey (and perhaps in life as well). As I mentioned before, if you are offsides, you let go of the puck, you should not carry it around and eventually fire it away from everyone else. If you get passed/beat on the ice, don't reach out and hook, hold or slash at the player who has gotten past you. Teeing up a slapshot when you are five feet away from a goalie is just mean and a good way to injure a goalie. If the goalie makes a save, don't try to slash at his/her glove to get the puck loose again and you certainly should not try to pressure the defensive team immediately after the goalie makes the save. Finally, if you drill someone by accident, take the time to apologize. You don't have to stop but you should at least be somewhat polite.
All of that said, several things happened that night that tipped the scales in my head.
Our goalie made a save and play shut down. He pushed the puck toward me and as I began to collect it, an opposing player charged in to try and intercept the "pass" (the goalie and I were about 5 feet apart). I made a quick move to protect the puck and skated away. As I did, this other player reached out and hooked my upper arm. Not a little tub but one of those mean hooks that feels like someone just pulled a hack saw across your arm. And this is when I saw red. I turned on him and gave him a shove. I am ashamed to admit that as we wrestled, I was trying to pull his helmet off (he was wearing a full shield, I had only a half shied on) so I could throw a punch. We were quickly separated by friends and I began to skate toward my bench. He called out over his shoulder and asked, "Did it hurt". My response was a simple, "yeah" and then he chirped back, "Good". If I was seeing red before, I could see nothing now. I went after him again and luckily, friends intervened and I was pulled away. I went to my bench and remained quite pissed. He went home (I think at the quiet suggestions of our friends).
Was this right? No, looking back on it, it all seems quite childish. Yet that is the game of hockey. We are grown men with sticks in our hands and they can be used as weapons. I am glad to know that when I lost my temper, I had the presence of mind to drop my stick and at least use my hands to settle the situation. I hope to never do that again and at the same time, I hope that he has learned his lesson.
Do I harbor a grudge? No. In fact, I really don't even know which player it was. If he asks about it later, I think I will just run through the etiquette of drop in hockey with him and hope he is willing to learn a little bit from an old curmudgeon like me.
