Grateful for an old friend

I came across her post last weekend. The song stuck with me after Emiko seemed to like it. Hope agreed that it was a good cover as well.

Tonight, all was quiet in the house as Hope had passed out on the sofa. Emiko was asleep upstairs and I turned to one of the guitars to see if I still could teach myself how to play a song. A few moments listening, a few moments of tuning and I started to catch it.

Thanks, Sedson, for getting me to dust off a guitar tonight. It was relaxing and reinvigorating at the same time. A few moments of time to myself while I made a little music.

Late nights

Emiko, you woke up last night and quietly called out for Daddy. Thanks for being so considerate...you didn't even wake up Mom who needs her sleep right now. You asked me to pick you up and we cuddled in the glider for a handful of precious minutes before you started nodding off again. I asked if you were ready to go back to bed and you said yes. But I wasn't ready to put you down.

I cherish these moments with you. I marvel at both how much you have grown and how you still fit so perfectly in my arms. I cherish your sleepy hugs and your quiet answers to my questions. I marvel at how clearly your mind processes thoughts, even when you are so tired. I will cherish these quiet father and daughter moments for the rest of time.

All my love,

Dad

Canadian Thanksgiving

Family and friends, all at our house....

We got to do the full turkey and all the fixings in honor of all things Canadian today (actually...it just made sense since Mom was in town and Molly and Cheryl will be working for Thanksgiving).

A tremendous guest list made it even more fun. Cousin Chris, Uncle Sam, Aunties Molly and Cheryl, Mom, Cousin George, Auntie Mary Jo, and of course the Colorado Mukai family were all in attendance.

Good times, good food and I'm wiped. But a huge thanks to all for showing up and making this Sunday such a special day. Emiko had a wonderful time with new friends and old!

Overdue thank you

We were given an album a while ago by one of our dearest friends. And we appreciated the music for many reasons. The is a Middlebury connection, an artist we have enjoyed in the past and it is fantastic acoustic music.

I was out driving the other day and this one song came up on the iPod. And it suddenly struck me. Not that it wasn't pointed out before by our friend but for some reason the song suddenly rang true.

I finally heard the lyrics. I finally heard the notes. It finally came together and made sense.

So thanks Fibby. I needed this!


If I could wash your fears away
And walk you down to the waters edge
Read your fortune in the stars above
If it would set your mind at ease.

And I would take your hand in mine
We would sing a new song
Walk you home by the light of the April moon
If it would set your mind at ease.

Lay your worries and your trouble by the front door, Son
C'mon in 'cause it's supper time
May your heartache bother you no more, Son
Little child of mine.

If I could chase those clouds away
And turn that raining into sunshine
If I could speak the healing of your heart
You know I would set your mind at ease.

Lay your worries and your trouble by the front door, Son
C'mon in 'cause it's supper time
May your heartache bother you no more, Son
Little child of mine.

Darling won't you play with me
Hem these rays of sunlight
Darling won't you stay with me
'Til I know that it's alright

Alright, yeah
Alright, yeah

Sweet child don't cry
And I will sing a lullaby
Sweet child don't cry
And I will sing a lullaby

-Winslow's Lullaby, The Sweet Remains

Happy Birthday

While this serves as a (bit belated posting) happy birthday to my wonderful wife, what really passes through my mind is a moment of appreciation.

I want to say thank you to her father and mother for bringing such a wonderful person into this world...my world. I am truly blessed to have such a wonderful partner in my life and attribute much of that to everything her parents gave her.

To Barb and Skip, a heartfelt thank you. I hope we can do as much for our daughter as you have done for yours.

A difficult weekend

I've had some tough weekends. The one that comes to mind most recently was when my appendix burst. All the fun and shenanigans associated with that operation (not to mention the sales meeting I was helping run) were pretty painful and dreary.

But this weekend tops the bill.

Diagnosed with the flu on Friday, I was told in no uncertain terms by our pediatrician that passing it along to Emiko could be deadly.

That's an eye opener.

Now tie it in with the fact that Hopey had her Master's class all weekend long. Who in the hell is going to look after the kid? Gibson?

I've been sequestered in my room, subjected to the harangue of my father and brother (who rolled into town on Thursday night) and tortured by the sound of her cries. This has easily been the most painful place I've ever had to be: listening to her grief throughout each day and not being able to go to her side. Not being able to walk over and make her laugh. Finding tears of my own forming when I could hear how unhappy she was. I've worn a little surgical mask (courtesy of Cheryl) every time I've left my prison. I've washed my hands religiously (even before going to the bathroom). But I've kept my distance from her at all times.

Through all of this, I've been blessed with my father and brother's presence. Cheryl came over on Friday night to help them out since they had arrived with no expectation of being put on babysitting trial. Let's just say they passed with flying colors.

Dad has been a trooper throughout. He has fed her, changed diapers and held her through her squalling. He has been so endearing to her that, on Saturday night after Hopey got home, Emi held her arms out to him so he could pick her up! This has made me smile, cry and laugh all at the same time (though I try not to laugh because it makes me cough like I'm losing a lung).

Jeffy to has been a huge help. He's looked after Gibson, helped around the house and, here's the big one, even changed a diaper! He swore he was never, ever going to change a diaper...at least not until he had to change one for his own child. But Emi found a way to convince him!

A huge thanks to all for what they have done for my family this weekend. I really don't know what we would have done if they had so fortuitously been here in Colorado.

I've also learned something by this forced and necessary exile. I've learned a little something about fatherhood. Each time Emi cried, I wanted to rush to her side. But I learned that my father hasn't forgotten what it takes to comfort a teary child. He still has it. I realized that my standing over him wearing a mask could possibly just make him nervous as I would have tried to offer hints or suggestions while he held a frantic baby. I realized that he would figure it out on his own; she's not that different from any other child that came before or will come after.

And I can see how applicable this is for Emi in the days and years to come when she is learning something new that I think is just second nature. She will figure it out. I won't need to stand over her because she will eventually get it the same way the rest of us did. I remember how my father taught me that too.

My Dad is a hockey deity in central Maine. Everyone knew who he was when I was growing up. He played, he coached, he taught power skating and he ran the rink. When I played, he stood in the far corner of the stands and watched. Just watched. When he met me in the lobby, we'd walk to the car and I'd put my gear in the back before we began our 45 minute drive home. And he never once offered to speak first about the game. He always waited until I asked. He let me figure it out on my own and he knew that if I wanted his help, I would ask.

And so, while this has been the most difficult and painful weekend I have in memory, I plan to cherish it for all that I have learned and look back upon it happily for years to come.

Mike Monsoor

Mike's name was passed on to me in an email from the head of the officials in the CHL. There is a fraternity among all officials and we all remain keenly aware of the sacrifice our brothers and sisters give to our country. Color guards frequent the rinks we work in, the National Anthem conjures images for all of us and there are often videos from local men and women serving abroad asking that everyone in the building rise for the Star Spangled Banner. Stories of our military circulate amongst us via email, phone calls or tales in the locker room.

Many things go through my mind during our National Anthem. In among those thoughts are my gratitude to Sam and Stephen who have and still serve our nation in times of peace and unrest.

And stories, like the one of Mike Monsoor, bring tears to my eyes each time I think of their bravery during war in the face adversity.

Thanks

It almost feels like it would be far to easy to write about what we have to give thanks for this year. Many of the things are obvious and nearly all revolve around our daughter, Emiko. The remainder would be for friends and family.

On the drive home last night, my friend and officiating colleague and I had a conversation about this. And we touched upon many of the things that strike us as unfair in life. We are lucky and thankful for our children but we spoke of good friends who would be fantastic parents and are unable to conceive. Not to mention the hoops they have to jump through in order to be adoptive parents.

My suggesting for this Turkey Day (or National Gluttony Day) is to slow down. Don't rush a thing today but take stock in the family and the friends we are all so lucky to have. We have struggles and stresses on a daily basis and we often rush through every day and lose sight of the fantastic miracles that surround us.

Happy Thanksgiving.

All of our love,

Seth, Hope, Emi and Gibson

Madelyn Dunham

I'm not one who deals well with death...I never know what to say and words always seem to become flustered and choked.

But to you, I'd like to say a simple thanks. Thank you for sharing your incredible grandson with us, for raising him to become the man who stands on the verge of history in the making. I can only hope that tomorrow's election will conclude with him as the decisive victor. It is clear that the contributions you have made to his life and education created the star he has become and that your memory will live on. We should all aspire to raise our children as you raised yours.

Pax vobiscum.

Ray Lamontagne

A huge thanks to Molly and Cheryl for last night. Cheryl for getting us tickets to see Ray Lamontagne over at Macky Auditorium. And Molly for looking after Emi while we were off galavanting around.

Ray played well last night...it seems like every show ends up just a little bit better than the one before. Most of the time, he was playing with his band but he did do a few songs solo. He even addressed the audience for a somewhat extended period of time...he had us all in stitches.

Some day we will bring Emiko to one of his shows and hope that she appreciates his music as much as we do.

Pride

I have several friends who have taken on a great deal of societal responsibility. From social work to teaching to simply helping others in need, I am proud of you all.

Mr. Baldwin and I share the typical male friendship. We pick on each other, give one another a great deal of grief and, when we were younger, we used to tear around our family homes wrestling and breaking various things.

All of that aside, I'm not sure words can quite express how proud I am of what Brandon is doing back home in Maine. He has taken on a great deal of responsibility in doing his part in helping educate children and promote their acceptance of diversity. I envy him for what he does and proud that he is one of my greatest friends.

All because of this.

Keep it up Mr. Baldwin. You are broadening horizons and making a difference!

Arriving home with Emi

We were able to bring Emiko home from the hospital on Friday in the early afternoon.

Driving takes on a whole new meaning when you have a little one secured in the backseat. I'm so much more nervous, scared of other drivers but feel that our little family is comfortably ensconced in the safety of our Volvo (thanks so much to Robbie!).

As we rolled up to our house, we noticed pink balloons tied to our mailbox and more balloons as well as streamers as we pulled into the garage. Molly had decorated our house as our welcome home (thanks to YOU Molly, for decorations and taking care of Gibs while we were out and about).



Gibson was excited to see me as I walked through the door but he was looking expectantly at Hope as she climbed out of the car. A quick hi to her and then he completely melted when I carried Emiko into the house. It is almost like he looked at us and said, "Finally. I've been wondering when you would figure it out and bring home a kid to complete this family!"

Gibson won't leave her side. Where he once slept by himself in the kitchen or living room at night, he now sleeps by the bassinet. When Hope gets up in the middle of the night to feed Emi, Gibs will go with them and sit by them as Hope nurses. If I am changing a diaper, he stands by my side as I clean Emi and get her dressed again.

We continue to be so impressed by this dog.



And now it is time for another nap. We hope to see you all soon here in Colorado.

Thanks Mom

This truly is a sincere thank you, Mom.

I was driving home tonight, from the rink of course, and I was listening to the BBC's coverage of the Republican National Convention. And I was thinking about how all of McCain's speeches lacked in substance, seemed very empty and were largely just him talking about...himself. He just sounds small when you listen to only his voice.

And I thought of all I heard during the DNC. The Clinton's pledging their very existence to Obama's canidacy. And how Obabama seems larger than life. And then I thought of this comic that I saw in Newsweek earlier tonight during dinner.

It brought a tear to my eye. I was simultaneously reminded of how we, as a family, celebrated Dr. Martin Luther King every year. Mom has always been fastidious in her yearly reminder to her sons to reflect on who MLK was, what he meant to our country and our society, what he had started but had been unable to finish.

Recent years have driven that home even more. NPR's yearly memorial to MLK have been fantastic. They have delved into MLK as a human, a man, a father, a friend. They have picked apart his words to prove that we are all his children, we are all part of his dream.

So with that, thank you Mom. MLK's dream lives on in all of us. His dream will be passed to your grandchildren as I expect you to pick up where you left off with us, celebrating his life every year.

And I hope and dream that a change will happen shortly. Imagine an African American man serving the highest post offered in the US. If only our dreams and reality are able to intertwine, the very fabric of our society will be rewoven again as we move forward. Our country can be such an amazing place....

Things I love

News such as this make me happy.

I know I'm up way too late. But this just makes me giddy. I'm glad to see Maine is on the right side of the sword when it comes to homosexual rights. Cutting edge? No... but leading edge I can work with.

I told Hope years ago that I refused to marry until my gay friends were afforded the same right by our government. Granted, we all now know who wears the pants in this relationship but I still know that there is no reason they are denied the ultimate expression of their love in front of the families, friends and peers. The right wing party even managed to win an election by getting out the vote based on the pervasive Christian fear of homosexuality. I know, I know. Not ALL Christians...I wasn't talking about YOU.

Well, John Q. Public spoke up in Maine. $821 in contributions? "Yes for Marriage and Equality" is a joke. I can only hope their latent homophobia is dragged out to some far reach in Maine and left to rot in a swamp somewhere. Actually, that's too good a burial. Run it through the Portland sewage treatment plant and send those cleansed waters out to sea. The one thing that irks me is that they found 5,000 signatures to affix to their petition. Then again, that's what? .4% of the overall population? I know, we'll annex Coburn Gore to to Canada and let the Quebecois deal with them!

Let's usher in a new era. Somehow, we are going to fix this country one step at a time. I know we can't bend everyones vantage to our liberal panorama but hopefully we can at least let them see how an open mind will not destroy that which our founding fathers and mothers set forth for us oh so long ago. 

Thank you, my fellow Mainers, for helping lead the way in these uncertain times. Thank you for proving that a rural state can still be open minded. Thank you for making me smile and laugh so late at night. Thank you for doing the right thing. Thank you.

Next on the agenda... getting rid of Maine's "boiled lobster" license plate!